OK so now what??

I think some people were expecting me to have a mental break down over this..but I can honestly say that I am doing great! Don't get me wrong I was expecting to have some "blue" days myself with those damn hormones in play and I have had a few moments but not really having to do with the surrogacy itself. I started cying on the Friday after I got home because Liam told me that I was mean (I would not let him have candy before dinner or something..) and ofcourse I get emotional over what I have actually done here.. I guess you would have had to be there when my IP's saw their precious baby girl the first time, or when they fed her for the first time etc etc..it was truly a miracle to witness. The instant love they had for her..I know I have been there with Liam and Emma but to actually see another couple go through it with their own baby! First of all most people are not in the birthing room with a couple (other than medical people) to see that - now obviously they had no choice here but I feel I was blessed to see this. To know that I helped make this happen...WOW!!

Baby is doing wonderfully - Cliff and I went up to visit a week ago and they are all doing great! I am sure now they have gotten into some type of routine.

So now what?? That is what I am suffering from.. what the hell do I do now? What just took place in the last year was HUGE..how do you go back to being normal? To no longer being a surrogate? I was prepared for dealing with the emotions of everything. I have spent years reading about this and then just spent the last year communicating with other surro's and seeing how they dealt with everything in their journies. That is probably why this has been so easy on me..there is one article in particular that I will post right after this that may explain how I am feeling now. I re-read it often just so I know I am not mental!

As for doing another journey?? I don't know..well I do know..if this couple asked me I would do it again in a second. I am hesitant about working with others..I have been so blessed with this couple. They are so easy going and it is just comfortable to be with them. So I guess only time will tell? I am not saying I would not work with another couple..just I am more weary.. but I will take lots of time (often surros get back on journey very quickly..within 2-3 months) but I want to take some time to lose LOTs of weight so if I do decide to do this again that I am in top shape!

So I guess that is it. I don't want to put the baby's name in here as it is not completely private but if you want to know just send me an e-mail!